THELEAFSNATION.COM LAUNCHES NOW
Wanye
October 09 2010 09:46PM
On November 27, 2007 we launched OilersNation.com roughly 45 days past our target date of the start of the season. January 28, 2008 we launched FlamesNation.ca, a mere 27 days past our deadline of "New Years or bust." April 10, 2009 saw the launch of CanucksArmy.com completely missing our goal of "catching the wave of playoff drive fever."
Well here we are barely 2 games into the 2010-11 NHL season and we have launched our newest work place productivity destroying site. Sure its a Saturday Night. Sure Citizen Alpha had to sacrifice his weekend to hang with Wanye at Nation HQ to get it launched. That is a small price to pay to launch a site for a team we cannot stand.
Today - TheLeafsNation.com begins.
NOW NOW
Every time we launch a new site the cat calls begin. "Why the hell would you want Vancouver to have a site Wanye? Can't the Oilers win every game and have the other 29 teams fold their franchises?"
No way Ray.
We have plans baby. Big plans. Plans that involve getting a band together and leaving this small town once and for all to go to Nashville. Then when we get there people will finally see what we have known since we were just a little girl. That we can be a Big Country Star and -
Er wait - different plan.
We want to see a Nation in every Canadian NHL City. It is our duty as a pyjama wearing Canadian hockey blogging/singing sensation. Plus, on some level we feel for Leafs fans. Suffering since 1967. Forced to watch Brian Burke sitting all high and mighty in the press box every night. Having to consider Tomas Kaberle to be a franchise d-man. That can't be easy can it?
For heavens sakes Dion Phaneuf is their Captain! All of you Flames fans should be giggling nightly in your 700 count sheets that you were able to ship him out of town. And besides, why shouldn't the 29th place team in the league have a Nation site? Misery loves company right?
THIS CHANGES NOTHING FOR YOU
While you have been enjoying your summer in a speed boat with topless supermodels, we have been scouring the face of the earth for top quality Leafs bloggers and negotiating with Toronto Sports Radio. Think that was easy? They can't even believe that computers are available west of Mississauga. But we got it done and are pleased to announce the signing of luminary Pension Plan Puppets to the site as our first contributors to the site.
More announcements will come in the following days on TheLeafsNation. The rest of us will be left alone on our respective sites to debate the merits of our particular teams. But in the meantime, do your ol' pal Wanye a favour will ya? Go tell whatever Leaf fans you know to put the 2-0 celebrations on hold for a minute and zip over to the newest site on the interwebs.
You have our undying gratitude and will receive a cheque for $6 in the mail*
Sexily yours,
Wanye.
*cheques will not be valid
What's with theleafsnation. Just call it thelosers.com and everyone will know which team you're referring to. Why don't you be grammatically correct and call it theleaves.com. Please don't put anything on this site again about Toronto, T.O. or anything from Ontario---the armpit of Canada.
hey guys, i love the fact that you are expanding the nations, but you need to add links to the other nation sites, so its easier to find them when looking for the other guys opinions
All hail the Canadian Hockey Nation!
Hey! That's my picture with the mustache!
The Leafs don't deserve their own nation. Wait.. maybe we can invade their nation and destroy them in honor of Thanksgiving! Edit: And OMG, my first fist!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Fine, I'll tell one friend Wayne. But that's it. I hate leaf fans lol
I love the fact that there are more team nations, but I'm not down with the logos... I wish the wicked-cool FIST was reserved for Oilersnation and not the godless flames or leafs.
I reject your offer to go to that horrible site but will recommend it to any leaf friends I know.
See once we sold our souls down below for a Flames site it has gotten easier and easier since to open more sites.
I hate the Flames WAY more than the Leafs thank-you-very-much.
But much like a criminal lawyer defends people they know are guilty, we too must encourage Leaf fans to destroy hours of valuable work time on a Nation site of their very own.
I actually think that Eldon and Citizen Alpha did a bang up job despite gagging every 15 minutes thinking about the Leaf fans that would use the site.
Yeah, but they can't comment on polls, so ... so there.
Edit: Curses! After further examination it appears they can. Well, whatever.
A sad day for all Nations involved. A sad day indeed...
Saying that good luck on the new venture, God knows there isn't enough leafs coverage already!
Oh, Wayne, I was wondering why the hell you didn't post a Squeelicious blog over Eberle! I'm glad you have a good excuse, though the leafs isn't good enough in my books!
This is EXACTLY the type of banter we are looking to encourage with the launch of the site.
DOWN WITH LEAVES INDEED
It took me a full day to recover from the liver related shelling before my fingers started working again
leaves... nice. I can't believe that's never occurred to me.
@Wayne
I just read your other article and must say, I nearly did the same as you for Hall at the Pre-Season game but they were all sold out, only Eberle jerseys left. Sholda got one!
What happens when you start a Montreal Nation?
Does it become CanadienNation? Because Canada is a nation, this might confuse us abusers of alcohol! I'm already confused, I've confused myself! Call it HabsNation please, my head hurts!
This is dumb. Who would ever wan to write for that site. Ever. They would have to be wrong in the head.
They ran out of Hall jerseys? THAT is impressive.
Montreal is going to come last as we are looking into launching two seperate sites - one in French and one in English. This is going to take a long time to create and will doubtlessly involve several trips to Montreal and their club districts.
What a minute - is this all about money? I am beginning to think it is. Some kind of create a place for hockey chumps to visit and exploit them by linking up with advertisers to brainwash them.
I thought all the stuff on the right were just Wanye's recommendations of good things to buy and do - kind of a list of favorites from a buddy. I was using them as a life guide - kind of treating Wanye like a life coach. I've gained like 50 lbs because all I do is eat wings, fajitas and pizza and drink beer at the Pint - there were no adds for carrots so I just presumed that they were bad for us. I was just about to sign up for Herbal Magic to deal with it...
Screw you Wanye - I am never coming back here to line your fancy velvet bourgeoisie pockets again!
So, I am totally excited to see if the momentum continues in tomorrow's game. Anyone else?
The change of your message in the span of the minute between your comments tells me the subliminal ads are working. Just stare into the rotating Boston Pizza ads. You will know what to do...
@book¡e
I would think that his pockets are lined with velour.
Pockets? What am I a Rockefeller?
You should contact Sean McIndoe (Down Goes Brown) to see if he'd write for the new Leafs site. His stuff is pretty witty.
I know where all this is going: a cage match between Oilers/Flames/Canucks/Leafs/Canadiens writers.
It is inevitable. It is your destiny.
@magisterrex
would that make Wanye everyone's father?
AND THE SENATORS ARE EXCLUDED FOR ALL ETERNITY.
That is our destiny.
Down Goes Brown is actually one of my favourite bloggers out there. I think he writes for the New York Times though now and won't want to accept our proposed payment of a dead bee, a comb and a non redeemable game piece from McDonalds Monopoly circa 2002.
But never say never I suppose. We have some MSMs on board in the next few weeks that should provide some zip.
That way leads only to madness...
Perhaps you could throw in a few previously used scratch & win cards and roll-up the rim to win Tim's cups. That might be just enough to swing the deal...
Ottawa. How could I forget Ottawa? Oh, wait...
@upper-deck-drunk
Uh... HabsNation?
@Wanye
I can't wait for JetsNations & NordsNation.
This font change is really messing with my head.
Or else it's the Bailey's.
Leafs. Canucks. Flames.
*slowly shakes head*
*continues using asterisks to p1ss off anti-asterisk guy*
Yay.
You promised me the comb. You're dead to me.
Wanye, I hate to break it to you....there is already a Leafs Nation where Leafs bloggers can vent....it's called TSN.com
Excellent point. Consider us a place for points of view for writers under the age of 150 then.
This ^
@Wanye
Times are tough Wanye, but I bet if you upped the ante with a button and a fluffy piece of pyjama pocket lint he'd be on board.
Ps: Congrats on the addition to your nation of nations
We gotta make sure all these sites are ready for prime time before we start pimping them hard.
@c_tux
Thank you very much!
Congratulations on your growing empire. Leafs fans don't deserve your eminence amongst them... but as long as their sponsors pay I guess it's all good ;-)
Wayne,
On this day of Thanksgiving I find myself thanking less due to this news. For the record I hate the Leafs and Flames equally as I hate both cities.