The Great American Victory Report Pt. 4: Still the one

Ryan Lambert
February 28 2010 09:08PM



Howdy folks.

The Olympics are, of course, all about athletic competition, pushing to be the best, and coming together as a global community to celebrate peace and goodwill. But let's be honest here, it's also about winners and losers. Canada may have won the most gold ever but I think it's time we took a look at the real winner: America.

As far as I know, I'm the only American (read also: non-loser) who writes for the various Nations, and that's why I have taken it upon myself to come here and remind you that the United States has and will continue to dominate "Your Olympics."

There are several very specific reasons why.

 

1. At no point did we have to change the rules.

Ready which country am I? "Oh hey, unbeatable speed skaters, we're pretty sure we're going to have to disqualify you and allow several Canadians to medal. Yeah, you, uh, changed lanes or something. Shoved somebody? Something like that. Tough noogies, pal."

I am Canada. Pretty easy to win when a Canadian official just so happens to be making decisions like that, I think.

2. Note to self: invent sports to win gold.

So Canada's getting dominated in medal count, right? All Canadians feel very sad about this. I read the tweets and blog posts, so don't try to tell me different. Then someone has the bright idea: maybe we just tell everyone the IOC has always gone by who had the most gold medals. Yeah okay guys sounds good, let's get that out there. But wait Canada didn't win ANY gold in Calgary.. what to do? Well, according to known Canadian Damien Cox: "Big reason why is most of the sports that have delivered gold in VAN didn't exist back then." Oh now it all makes sense. Make up a bunch of crap sports and win at those. You have to applaud the scheming brilliance.

3. Something about a hockey game.

Oh yeah, you beat a team with Chris Drury on it. Bravo. How did you ever accomplish such a towering feat? Oh right, you had it in your country with three Canadian officials. Well done.

4. I said right from the get-go that it's all about medal count.

And would ya lookit that. America: 37. Everyone else, especially Canada: considerably less than that. And again, that's with Canada making up some malarkey against the great and accomplished Apolo Anton Ohno.

(5. Neil Young rules)

(He totally does. And I called him jamming Long May You Run at the closing ceremonies. Best Canadian thing at the Olympics.)

686dfac3780611cb7acad6ce5166c6c1
Yer ol' buddy Lambert is handsome and great and everyone loves him. Also you can visit his regular blog at The Two-Line Pass or follow him on Twitter. Lucky you!
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#101 Oil Kings 'n' Pretty Things
March 01 2010, 02:37PM
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hiroki wrote:

Hello,

I guess I over reacted badly. Many people said it was bad to stop reading the Nation, and they are right. There is good conversation here and great articles, I cannot cut myself off from that just because of one person!

I must say though, I probably shouldn't have brought up the Japan comments TLP made on Twitter. They just seemed fitting considering how much emotion they stirred in me. The forum to do that on is on Twitter, not here, and for that I apologize.

But what saddened me the most was how this monster's work was on The Nation's homepage. I thank bingofuel for removing the offensive Luge joke from the article. Jason Gregor, all I can wish for is for you to not attack me for seeing something I found hurtful on Twitter. I follow all of the bloggers who cover the Flames, and it was hard to read what TLP wrote without feeling heavy in the heart. But this is the time of Free Speech, so I suppose I must bite the bullet. Its just difficult to understand why an esteemed member of the mainstream media such as yourself would 'side' with TLP, Mr Gregor.

Also,

@mesh:

Ha ha, you make a good point about the Flames missing the Playoffs. But never fear! Stajan is here!

I'm glad you're staying. You present yourself as intelligent and articulate. ~Unlike RossCreek and his crappy team of draft losers, you're a Flames fan I wouln't mind talking to on ON every once-in-a-while.~

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#102 Jason Gregor
March 01 2010, 02:45PM
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hiroki wrote:

Hello,

I guess I over reacted badly. Many people said it was bad to stop reading the Nation, and they are right. There is good conversation here and great articles, I cannot cut myself off from that just because of one person!

I must say though, I probably shouldn't have brought up the Japan comments TLP made on Twitter. They just seemed fitting considering how much emotion they stirred in me. The forum to do that on is on Twitter, not here, and for that I apologize.

But what saddened me the most was how this monster's work was on The Nation's homepage. I thank bingofuel for removing the offensive Luge joke from the article. Jason Gregor, all I can wish for is for you to not attack me for seeing something I found hurtful on Twitter. I follow all of the bloggers who cover the Flames, and it was hard to read what TLP wrote without feeling heavy in the heart. But this is the time of Free Speech, so I suppose I must bite the bullet. Its just difficult to understand why an esteemed member of the mainstream media such as yourself would 'side' with TLP, Mr Gregor.

Also,

@mesh:

Ha ha, you make a good point about the Flames missing the Playoffs. But never fear! Stajan is here!

Please tell me where I sided with him. I said what he wrote on here was uncalled for.

War is a very emotional time, and it was a long time ago. I never once downplayed what happened, and I'm sure it was tough for you. But there are many Canadians who lost family members during that same time. We've all suffered great loses because of it.

But as a country we have benefitted greatly due to the heroic efforts of those men and women.

Like I said, it wasn't mentioned on here. We don't control that. We took down the offensive comments on here.

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#103 hiroki
March 01 2010, 02:51PM
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@Gregor:

I sided with some of the commenters, instead of thinking deeply what you implied. Sorry, sometimes my lack of English let's me down. This is an awkward situation for you, and I apologize for being critical. Anyways, this is getting heavy! Let's just move on. No need to keep this up, feelings will just be hurt. Again thank you bingofuel and Gregor for your efforts.

Soooo... Any trades happen?

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#104 Mike
March 01 2010, 03:11PM
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Grebeshkov to the Preds for a 2nd rounder per Rishaug on Jason Gregor's show. Awesome deal for us.

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#105 RossCreekNation
March 01 2010, 03:51PM
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Crash wrote:

And suddenly Ross Creek has disappeared as well....so is TLP funny now RC?

This might even show you that TLP actually wasn't just trying to be funny all along...he actually is a grade A loser.

Pardon me?

A guy takes off for half a day and I have disappeared? Whatevs, man.

And yes... he's still funny. I suspect he was trying to get all his other writing's done (for PuckDaddy, etc.), and he fired this one up rather quickly (its quite a bit shorter than the rest... and he tweeted me before he posted it saying he wasn't sure he had time to write that last night, but he'd try). That line was in poor taste and has since been removed. Get ur panties out of a knot, Crash.

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#106 Crash
March 01 2010, 04:16PM
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RossCreekNation wrote:

Pardon me?

A guy takes off for half a day and I have disappeared? Whatevs, man.

And yes... he's still funny. I suspect he was trying to get all his other writing's done (for PuckDaddy, etc.), and he fired this one up rather quickly (its quite a bit shorter than the rest... and he tweeted me before he posted it saying he wasn't sure he had time to write that last night, but he'd try). That line was in poor taste and has since been removed. Get ur panties out of a knot, Crash.

The kind of line he wrote would get a poster banned here....the guy is a loser...and you defending him makes me wonder about you.

If I was to write that kind of trash do you think you might get your panties in a knot?

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#107 RossCreekNation
March 01 2010, 04:27PM
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@Crash

Which is why I said the line was in poor taste. I agree with it being removed and clearly TLP should have thought twice before hitting 'publish'. Take point #4 away, and the rest of the series of 'Victory Reports' was mostly funny.

And it wasn't so much 'defending' him. I was trying to let those who didn't see it as satire to see it that way and not that he actually meant every word he said.

The panties-in-a-knot line was meant in reference to you asking if I "suddenly disappeared". I realize now, that it may not have come off that way, but thats what I meant.

In any case, Crash... peace man.

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#108 jess
March 01 2010, 05:07PM
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should probably lock this thread..

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#109 Word
March 01 2010, 05:24PM
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RossCreekNation wrote:

Which is why I said the line was in poor taste. I agree with it being removed and clearly TLP should have thought twice before hitting 'publish'. Take point #4 away, and the rest of the series of 'Victory Reports' was mostly funny.

And it wasn't so much 'defending' him. I was trying to let those who didn't see it as satire to see it that way and not that he actually meant every word he said.

The panties-in-a-knot line was meant in reference to you asking if I "suddenly disappeared". I realize now, that it may not have come off that way, but thats what I meant.

In any case, Crash... peace man.

Certain people keep saying that his stuff is "funny". Are you guys for real or are you just sticking up for him out of professional courtesy. I think that should be the next ON poll: "Is TLP Funny?" I know how I'm voting...

I don't even care about the Canada-bashing or the tasteless humor (everyone crosses the good taste line once in a while), what bugs me is what TLP does to the average quality level of Nation writings.

FTLPNF

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#110 OilFan
March 01 2010, 05:54PM
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I don't recall any of TPL's articles being funny or good. THATS MY OPINION.

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#111 Crash
March 01 2010, 06:04PM
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RossCreekNation wrote:

Which is why I said the line was in poor taste. I agree with it being removed and clearly TLP should have thought twice before hitting 'publish'. Take point #4 away, and the rest of the series of 'Victory Reports' was mostly funny.

And it wasn't so much 'defending' him. I was trying to let those who didn't see it as satire to see it that way and not that he actually meant every word he said.

The panties-in-a-knot line was meant in reference to you asking if I "suddenly disappeared". I realize now, that it may not have come off that way, but thats what I meant.

In any case, Crash... peace man.

I never actually made any comments on TLP's previous attempts at being funny...I do remember you though trying to let those who didn't see it as satire to see it that way and at the time it appeared you were right on top of it.

It had seemed to me that after he made the less than impressive remarks in his latest humour attempt that you had gone missing on purpose. My apologies if that wasn't the case.

Peace it is

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#112 OilFan
March 01 2010, 06:08PM
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Please don't write anymore articles they are so so lame. Simple fact

No one likes TPL's articles. I go to the nation for Willis and Brownlee only. I don't mind Gregor but some times he is wishy washy

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#113 RossCreekNation
March 01 2010, 06:14PM
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Oh my! Look what TLP wrote (http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/blog/puck_daddy/post/What-We-Learned-Congrats-to-the-little-juggerna?urn=nhl,224853#remaining-content)

Canada - It really is unbelievable that Sid Crosby, of everyone on the Canadian roster, was the one to score the game-winner. I know it's the big thing to act like Crosby's not as good as he is and dives and cries or whatever but what this kid has accomplished, just in the last year alone, is ridiculous. Oh and he's still tied for the NHL lead in goals, in case you'd forgotten that.

Finland - In a move sure to guarantee Finland a gold medal in 2014, Olli Jokinen has announced that Saturday's bronze medal game was his last for the Finnish national team.

Slovakia - On top of everything else, Lubomir Visnovsky also got busted by the IOC for doping. "The (urine) sample provided on Wednesday indicated a higher level of pseudoephedrine than the approved World Anti-Doping Agency limit of 150 micrograms per milliliter." So he took Advil, basically.

USA - Y'know how mayors of cities whose teams are in, like, the Stanley Cup Finals or something, will bet some of its local cuisine (a case of hot dogs from Philly, pizza from New York, crippling depression from Detroit) on the outcome? Well Stephen Harper and Barack Obama did that over Sunday's hockey game. And what does Canada win? You guessed it: a 24-pack of Yuengling. Jeez, America, spring for the 30 at least.

~What poor quality of work he does~

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#114 JackBauer
March 01 2010, 06:42PM
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And you know Puck Daddy is a really really good website. I am really surprised they let a piece of trash like this write for them.

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#115 Word
March 01 2010, 06:47PM
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RossCreekNation wrote:

Oh my! Look what TLP wrote (http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/blog/puck_daddy/post/What-We-Learned-Congrats-to-the-little-juggerna?urn=nhl,224853#remaining-content)

Canada - It really is unbelievable that Sid Crosby, of everyone on the Canadian roster, was the one to score the game-winner. I know it's the big thing to act like Crosby's not as good as he is and dives and cries or whatever but what this kid has accomplished, just in the last year alone, is ridiculous. Oh and he's still tied for the NHL lead in goals, in case you'd forgotten that.

Finland - In a move sure to guarantee Finland a gold medal in 2014, Olli Jokinen has announced that Saturday's bronze medal game was his last for the Finnish national team.

Slovakia - On top of everything else, Lubomir Visnovsky also got busted by the IOC for doping. "The (urine) sample provided on Wednesday indicated a higher level of pseudoephedrine than the approved World Anti-Doping Agency limit of 150 micrograms per milliliter." So he took Advil, basically.

USA - Y'know how mayors of cities whose teams are in, like, the Stanley Cup Finals or something, will bet some of its local cuisine (a case of hot dogs from Philly, pizza from New York, crippling depression from Detroit) on the outcome? Well Stephen Harper and Barack Obama did that over Sunday's hockey game. And what does Canada win? You guessed it: a 24-pack of Yuengling. Jeez, America, spring for the 30 at least.

~What poor quality of work he does~

RossCreek I think you may have missed the point - I don't care whether he's lauding or hating on Canada.

[Note: I may have missed the point of your post by thinking it was the example of pro-Canada speech you are refering to, but I have to assume that this wasn't supposed to be an example of quality writing. And if your above insertion actually was intended to be a testament to the quality of TLP's writing rather than his warm and fuzzy stance on Canada, then I guess the standard for achieving "quality" is for one to sound like a tickertape summary of other people's news.]

I'm gonna step into the realm of offending alot of people who post with regularity here, but the majority of bloggers offer very little of value to the internet in my opinion. I would go so far as to say they kinda suck.

I read this place for the MSM input: more specifically, I want to know what Gregor, Steinberg and Brownlee have to say. Willis as well, but he's an exception because his number-based analysis is something that the MSM doesn't provide (I think most MSM readers would rather slit their wrists than read about CORSI numbers). What makes OilersNation articles (and very rare FlamesNation articles) special are the MSM insights and insider information.

I've been a (somewhat) quiet enjoyer of this site for a long time, but the quality dilution is concerning and I don't want it to turn into another fan forum. Fan blogs are a dime a dozen.

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#116 Word
March 01 2010, 06:48PM
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FTLPNF

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#117 KenL
March 01 2010, 07:17PM
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TigerUnderGlass wrote:

I want to agree with you...I really do.

The problem is that you completely lost me when you decided to prove your manliness by demonstrating your knowledge of men's figure skating.

Yah, I thought my credibility would take a hit with the figure skating reference. But hey, even Gregor and Spector called out the sissy American skater who couldn't pull off a Quad on Gregor's show last week.

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#118 KenL
March 01 2010, 07:20PM
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OilFan wrote:

I don't recall any of TPL's articles being funny or good. THATS MY OPINION.

I think the majority is with you. Taunting isn't humor. Anyone can be a jackass as TLP continues to demonstrate.

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#119 Rob...
March 01 2010, 07:42PM
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@Jason Gregor

I'd like you to try to look at the response of the faithful a different way. A fair number of the people here hated what TLP said, but what they hated more was that it was posted on THIS site as if it was officially sanctioned by the Oilers Nation staff. Most of the people here have grown accustom to a certain level of integrity from all who write here. They assume that the topics may wander away from hockey and the Oil from time to time, and jokes may fail now and again but that the authors are always the sort of people who you'd be honored to have a beer with.

The grumblings over several of TLP's blogs let you know that the reputation was in jeopardy, while the 4th bullet in this 'article' was just too much. [Thank you to bingofuel for his statement and action involving that.]

In the end, you can look at the those who posted negatively as a bunch of thin-skinned whiners, or you can look at it as a bunch of ON fans doing the only thing they could in defense of this site... post their displeasure in with the hope that somebody who could do something about it would notice.

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#120 Greg MC
March 01 2010, 08:05PM
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FTLPNF? Fire Tambellini Lowe Prendergast now @$!/ers

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#121 Victoria
March 01 2010, 08:09PM
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@Rob...

Well said! It's one thing to have to read bloggers from Flames Nation ripping on the Oilers (we can take that), but TPL's ridiculous attitude about our country crosses the line.

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#122 Jason Gregor
March 01 2010, 08:37PM
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Rob... wrote:

I'd like you to try to look at the response of the faithful a different way. A fair number of the people here hated what TLP said, but what they hated more was that it was posted on THIS site as if it was officially sanctioned by the Oilers Nation staff. Most of the people here have grown accustom to a certain level of integrity from all who write here. They assume that the topics may wander away from hockey and the Oil from time to time, and jokes may fail now and again but that the authors are always the sort of people who you'd be honored to have a beer with.

The grumblings over several of TLP's blogs let you know that the reputation was in jeopardy, while the 4th bullet in this 'article' was just too much. [Thank you to bingofuel for his statement and action involving that.]

In the end, you can look at the those who posted negatively as a bunch of thin-skinned whiners, or you can look at it as a bunch of ON fans doing the only thing they could in defense of this site... post their displeasure in with the hope that somebody who could do something about it would notice.

If you haven't noticed the Nations are now in three cities, and certain articles will be posted on all three.

Sure it pissed some people off, while some thought it was funny. Up until the body comment, none of his writings were off-side. Annoying to Canadians, yes!

That was the point I think. To make a little rivalry and it seemed to work. The fact he is a Flames fan just annoys Oiler fans even more, and to me that is good. The Oiler/Flames rivalry has sucked for awhile so stirring up a little anger isn't a bad thing from where I sit.

If everyone likes every article and every comment the site will get pretty boring. And look at the good side, you won't have to read any Olympic jibberish from him until 2014...

I understand people were annoyed, but normally most of the posters have a good sense of humour and some good zingers. While some of you didn't like his articles, I can tell you the owner of the site did, and if she does then you might see more from time-to-time.

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#123 Matt Henderson
March 01 2010, 08:41PM
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Who owns this site? Is she hot? Is this public knowledge that I somehow overlooked?

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#124 Jason Gregor
March 01 2010, 08:41PM
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OilFan wrote:

Please don't write anymore articles they are so so lame. Simple fact

No one likes TPL's articles. I go to the nation for Willis and Brownlee only. I don't mind Gregor but some times he is wishy washy

Wishy washy...How about you shut you damn pie hole...or maybe just keep writing cause your thoughts are insightful...or maybe you could be more polite next time...or maybe you should read more of TLP...or maybe just read ON...or maybe go watch the Bachelor, I hear it is great TV...or maybe don't change anything...you choose...I can't make a decision clearly...

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#125 RossCreekNation
March 01 2010, 08:51PM
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Matt Henderson wrote:

Who owns this site? Is she hot? Is this public knowledge that I somehow overlooked?

Owwwns. Owwwns. Who owwwn da Nations?

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#126 Matt Henderson
March 01 2010, 09:08PM
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@RossCreekNation

Jeez RC, this isnt the DaVinci code.

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#127 Wanyes bastard child
March 01 2010, 09:29PM
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Matt Henderson wrote:

Who owns this site? Is she hot? Is this public knowledge that I somehow overlooked?

Please tell me its Lynda Steele, pleasepleaseplease!

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#128 Matt Henderson
March 01 2010, 09:38PM
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@Wanyes bastard child

Is it weird that I was thinking the exact same thing?

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#129 RossCreekNation
March 01 2010, 09:44PM
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Matt Henderson wrote:

Jeez RC, this isnt the DaVinci code.

Ah... DaVinci Code, huh? Or maybe Slapshot...

Who owwwn da Chief?

Wasn't it a woman?

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#130 Rob...
March 01 2010, 10:49PM
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@Jason Gregor

RE: "If you haven't noticed the Nations are now in three cities, and certain articles will be posted on all three.

Sure it pissed some people off, while some thought it was funny. Up until the body comment, none of his writings were off-side. Annoying to Canadians, yes"

You're right, the only comment I thought was off-side was the body comment.

Let's draw a parallel to 1260 though, Jason. You've got a show where your intent and consistent success seems to involve providing great interviews and sports commentary, with a side-dish of entertaining non-sports dialogue. Sure you get the odd douche who calls in, talking like TLP and you tear them a new one, but what you'd never do is recommend that the douche get their own show simply because they managed to insult and get a rise out of the listeners.

My perception is that this is all that TLP currently offers on ON.

PS: On how everyone liking things will lead to a boring site: The last article I saw that absolutely everyone liked was written by Brownlee about Father's day 3/4 of a year ago. I don't think ON risks becoming boring due to a lack of opposition to views expressed here.

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#131 Ambassador humantorch
March 02 2010, 01:19PM
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Greg MC wrote:

FTLPNF? Fire Tambellini Lowe Prendergast now @$!/ers

Now THIS is an initiative I can get behind 110%.

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#132 Harlie
March 02 2010, 01:28PM
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Jason Gregor wrote:

Great interpretation of what I said.

The fact is for the past three weeks I couldn't believe how sensitive the readers were to a guy looking like a fool pumping up the Americans.

Like I said, the comments about the bombing weren't on here. The reader posted them, so what does that have to do with our site???

A comeback that is witty and insightful and not just the usual I hate Americans would have been good. Disappointed because I have seen the Nation readers come up with way better one-liners ripping guys they like over the years, and there weren't many on TLP's articles.

Did I once tell Hiroki to have a better comeback. No I asked him why he follows someone he doesn't like.

And where did I side with what TLP said?? His comments about Body count were stupid and taken down.

TLP's articles, while annoying to you, were well written (excluding the off-side comment about body count). If you don't like that is fine, but please don't get all over dramatic here. He made one off-hand comment and it was taken down.

Like I said the first time. We don't control his twitter account, nor do we promote it on here. Most of you wouldn't have even read what he said if Hiroki hadn't put it up. How does this relate to the Nation. That was the point.

Looks like you didn't interpret what I said very well either.

1) I never insinuated or implied or even said that you once sided with what TLP said.

2) TLP's articles haven't been annoying to me. In fact, I had a good laugh on the first couple and I along with Rosscreek, Bingo and others were poking fun at others who couldn't laugh at themselves on his previous articles.

3) Ok maybe you didn't directly tell Hiroki to have a better comeback to TLP, but if you re-read your original response to Hiroki you will see that the focus was directed at Hiroki for the first paragraph and the last paragraph. It was in between those paragraph's that you directed your post at the Nation. So your post leaves it to a bit of interpretation if you were focusing to Hiroki and the Nation or just Hiroki. My fault there!

4) Hiroki was the one that brought up and posted TLP's twitter's and I agree that stuff wasn't part of ON content and I have no issue with that. The issue I have is that you called out Hiroki for digging into TLP's other places where he posts to see if the guy was for real or what and lo and behold he saw that other disgusting comment. In defense of Hiroki if I was offended by the On article (bodycount) and then I decided to look into TLP i would go to his website and then look into his twitter as well. Same as what I think Hiroki did. So I'm not sure why you had an issue there. The guy was merely doing some due diligence.

5) Lastly, I like you and I like your radio show and I don't want to get into a pissing war with you. Having said that, I learned awhile back when I was working for a Fortune 500 company that one of the emails I sent out wasn't taken the way I had intended it. My boss sat me down and let me know that tone can be detected in an email and that I had to be aware of that, especially in an email that many people had to read. Just saying that sometimes your tone comes off as condescending and aggressive on your posts. Your articles are great and so is your radio show and I think that tone works great on the radio, but in a post by post blog setting you may want to adjust your tone a bit.

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#133 TDSM31
March 02 2010, 03:27PM
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I getted banned from the Nation for backtalking Brownlee and this assclown is allowed to post this garbage article???

**This message will self destruct in 10...9...8...7...**

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#134 Oilfan2010
March 02 2010, 07:10PM
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TDSM31 wrote:

I getted banned from the Nation for backtalking Brownlee and this assclown is allowed to post this garbage article???

**This message will self destruct in 10...9...8...7...**

How do I give this props?

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