GDB 36.0: FEASTER AND FAMINE

Jason Gregor
April 03 2013 02:53PM

While the Flames shipped out Jarome Iginla and Jay Bouwmeester and replaced them with prospects that Barry Fraser wouldn't draft, the Oilers skate into the Saddledome ready to show Flames fans what six years of sucking can do for you.

The Flames haven't won a playoff series since 2004, the Oilers have won three since then, and in 24 days the Phlegms will be out of the playoffs for the 4th straight year. Make no mistake the last seven years have been brutal for Oilers fans, but at least they have something to show for their loyalty. The Oilers seven-year drought produced Taylor Hall, Jordan Eberle, Ryan Nugent-Hopkins, Nail Yakupov, Magnus Paajarvi and Sam Gagner.

The Flames' plunge into suckville has garnered them first rounders like: Mikael Backlund (softer than oleo), Greg Nemisz (4th liner in AHL), Tim Erixon (oops, he wouldn't sign in your dump of a city), _______ (didn't have 1st or 2nd round pick when missing 2010 playoffs), Sven Baertschi (solid potential 2nd liner) and Mark Jankowski (say it slowly, Stanstead College in Quebec).

Rob Schremp and Marc Pouliot had a brighter future.

Most Oilers fans won't poke that much fun at Calgary, okay one might in a few paragraphs, mainly because Edmontonians doesn't possess the inferiority complex that exists in Calgary. Oiler fans won't need to say, "At least we finished higher in the standings than you," which was the rallying cry in Calgary the last three years.

Think about that for a second.

Your team never made the playoffs, in fact they "Choked" every year in the final ten games. For the past three years, the Flames were close to the playoffs with ten games to go, and in those combined 30 games, you won a paltry 12. You averaged 4 wins in the final 10 games of the season in your annual push-to-the-playoffs-only-to-fail-and-not-get-a-top-ten-pick.

The only thing more inept than Steve Tambellini's summer free agent signings, is the Flames management in February and March and the Flames play on the ice in March and April.

Which leads us to tonight...

The Oilers and their fans head into this game knowing they will win, which is exactly how the Flames and their fans have felt the last three years. It won't be much of a battle, considering the Flames most effective forward these days is Brian McGrattan.

The Flames got a better return for Joe Piskula than they have for Jarome Iginla and Jay Bouwmeester. At least McGrattan is on your team and contributing. Top-notch GMing by Feaster and company.

  • Hall/Nugent-Hopkins/Eberle
  • Paajarvi/Gagner/Hemsky
  • Jones/Horcoff/Yakupov
  • Brown/Smyth/Petrell

  • Smid/Petry
  • N.Schultz/J.Schultz
  • Whitney/Potter

  • Dubnyk

The Flames will counter with a lineup that would battle stage an epic battle with the 2010 Oilers:

GAME DAY PREDICTION: Oilers win their 5th straight with an easy 4-2 win. The Oilers top line has combined for 19 points in the last four games and they will register six tonight.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Many in Calgary will claim, "Awesome deal, getting something (5th rounder) for Blake Comeau." Get used to saying this Flames fans, as you enter into the phase where you think every draft pick will pan out eventually.

NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: After he admitted Monday night that he hadn't been, "intellectually honest about his team," Jay Feaster announces during the 2nd period intermission that the Flames will indeed be a playoff contender next year. "Mikka Kiprusoff begged me not to trade him today. He's committed to winning and we will sign him to an extension in the summer.

"Also, now that Jarome Iginla, who secretly always preferred his hometown over Calgary, is gone our core guys will flourish. Want to wager on where we finish relative to Edmonton next year? I’ll tell you very honestly. I’m getting a little sour. How many teams . . . every year, for the last 10 years, five years, eight years, have finished in the bottom five, bottom seven, bottom 10? They’ve had a pick anywhere from No. 1 to No. 10 year after year after year after year, and they still wander in the desert. And they’re no closer to getting out than they were 10 years ago. We are still positioned better than the Oilers," screams Feaster. 

Good times...

***UPDATE...Turns out the NSOGDB wasn't that far off... An actual quote from Jay Feaster today..."Murray Edwards (Flames majority owner)  told me last evening that he expects us to be in the playoffs next year." You can't make this up. Wow, Edwards is delusional if he believes that. 

AND NOW A WORD FROM A DIEHARD OILER FAN

Jeanshorts runs the Oilersnation twitter and when he heard I was writing this GDB he begged me to let him write a quite blurb on behalf of all Oilers fans... so here goes... 

Oh, Calgary...

Where do we even begin? 

You're like the Springfield Tire Yard of the NHL; You're ugly, can be smelled in 46 states (and 10 provinces) and you're nothing but a humungous pile of burning rubble at this point.  

If this is what Jay Fester considers "retooling" then dear god DO NOT let him near your car. It'd be like Pimp My Ride if instead of putting TV's and a new engine in they blew the car up and told you to "never speak of this again!" 

Although, it's not like we should really be surprised that Feaster buttfumbled BOTH the Iginla and Bouwmeester trades. We've all seen Spaceballs; it's only a matter of time until he accidentally locks himself in a limousine and eats himself to death. 

But hey, it's not all no-name prospects and crying into your cousins breasts in Cowtown. I mean, at least your leading goal scorer isn't former Oiler 4th liner Curtis Glencross. 

And it's not like you're relying on a guy who hasn't played an NHL game in 4 years and only has 11 career wins to be your number one goalie next season.

Or that your hot-shot first round pick flamed out (PUN INTENDED) with only one assist in his 10-game stint. 

Or that you traded away two of your marquee players and somehow wound up with an even worse prospect pool than you started with, which was already one of the worst in the league. 

Actually, basically all that's left is for Murray Edwards to sign Feaster to a five year extension and you'll be set!  

 You know what, this is typical Calgary. First you steal all our business headquarters and now you have the audacity to steal the title of "Most Comically Inept Run Team In The National Hockey League"? THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS! 

Unfortunately Calgary looks like they'll be rewarded for this absolute atrocity of a season with a top-three pick. The good thing is that with their recent draft history the nation of Bosnia will be able to celebrate their country's first ever draft pick as the Flames select their top high school player Ahmed Mujo (56GP-0G-0A). 

We fully believe in Karma and things coming full circle. Flames fans, and management, have been ripping the Oilers futility hard for the last 4 years. I hope you brought a flashlight, sleeping bag and foamy Calgary, because the basement is dark, damp and it smells like Jerry Sandusky's rec room. Payback's a bitch and this one's going to hurt. A lot. 

Tell your hot cousin I said what's up. 

"They're ALL my hot cousin!" - Guy from Calgary

Love, Oilersnation

 RECENTLY BY JASON GREGOR

Ddf3e2ba09069c465299f3c416e43eae
One of Canada's most versatile sports personalities. Jason hosts The Jason Gregor Show, weekdays from 2 to 6 p.m., on TSN 1260, and he writes a column every Monday in the Edmonton Journal. You can follow him on Twitter at twitter.com/JasonGregor
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#451 vetinari
April 03 2013, 11:13PM
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RexLibris wrote:

Plante and Abney for that 5th round pick?

They're led by Feaster, Rex... that means we are likely able to get one of their first rounders for Plante and Abney... maybe even that BIG European goaltending prospect they traded J. Bo for (*snicker)...

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#452 RexLibris
April 03 2013, 11:15PM
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@vetinari

We have Tuohimaa and Perhonen to trade before this year's draft!

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#453 T__Bone88
April 03 2013, 11:17PM
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Yakupov scored the 99th goal of the year.... Is this a sign of a inner Gretzky coming out...YAKCITY!!!!

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#454 negrilcowboy
April 03 2013, 11:19PM
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oucho

yep playoffs next year.

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#455 Mikey
April 03 2013, 11:21PM
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G-G-G-Ghostride this bitch?!?

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#456 Rocket
April 03 2013, 11:22PM
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FireOnIce wrote:

Worry not Oilers fans. When the Flames are knocked out of playoff contention for sure in a game or two, they will go on a win streak, and down every team in front of you.

Enjoy the win. You'll need it once Jankowski becomes the best player from his draft class and we show you. Har, har, har. /facepalm

Win streak & down every team in front of The Oilers? Wow, thanks Flames that would really help The Oilers out.

Also, Jankoski might turn out good but best in his draft? I want what you're smoking 'cause it seems strong!

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#457 Bob Cobb
April 03 2013, 11:23PM
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That was great, beating the crap out of Calgary will never get old. It's going to be a whole lot more fun being an Oiler fan in Calgary over the next few years.

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#458 The Soup Fascist
April 03 2013, 11:26PM
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vetinari wrote:

Been a blast guys, good night and good luck to all the Flames fans that hung around until the bitter end. It gets easier. In 3 to 5 years.

You bet. The guys that stuck it out were good sports. A true BOA circa mid to late eighties would be awesome.

Here is hoping.

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#459 Crispy
April 03 2013, 11:34PM
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I love how Feaster said that the Flames hope to make the playoffs next year.... Belated April fools joke?

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#460 kdunbar
April 03 2013, 11:42PM
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So what happens if LB does not sign before the draft Calgary?

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#461 Oilcruzer
April 03 2013, 11:45PM
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If you are going to suck, may as well do it well. Pride gives you lousy draft positioning.

Scary part for Calgary is they let Feaster make these last couple trades. Why would you do that if you plan on firing him?

(the answer is the scary part)

Chin Up. HOPE is better than delusion.

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#462 OilerPunch
April 03 2013, 11:49PM
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Flames suck on these apples 8 :).

Another good omen for the Oilers is that the season is 99 days long!

Go Oilers Go!!!

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#463 Blitz
April 03 2013, 11:50PM
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Yeah we got pounded. Kudos to Oiler nation for that. Aye ya ya. *sips vodka* ..So this is the basement? Mmm.

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#464 drdoogie16
April 03 2013, 11:54PM
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@Jasongregor

Jason, thin-skinned maybe a bit, however thin-haired you got that one covered or I guess not covered in this case. Never have I seen as many posts on this sight - all the 'Oil' fan as they proudly call themselves have jumped out of their half tons and onto the old bandwagon once more. I'll give you greasy mullet heads this, you do stand behind your team!! The beauty of the new 'parody rules' NHL is that there is no long rebuild unless you are the Oiler or the Islanders. Didn't we think that the Habs, Blue Jackets and Ducks were going to be bottom feeders this year. What about Phoenix, NJ and St. Louis the previous year? Don't make idiotic statements like the Flames or any other franchise except the Oil are going to suck for 9 straight years. It ain't gonna happen so sorry to break it to you inbreds. Enjoy the rest of the season 'OIL FANS'!!!!

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#465 Wax Man Riley
April 03 2013, 11:54PM
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This definitely calls for a G-G-G-GHOST RIDE !!!!

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#466 justDOit
April 03 2013, 11:58PM
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Nice effort boys. Two Bettman points out of California will be enough to keep this juggernaut going!

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#467 DigDeepNBleedBlue
April 03 2013, 11:59PM
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That game was ugly. Damn! Even the crowd has turned.

Good times!

Vancouver's fragile right now. Go for blood!

Win and the Oil keep themselves, for sure, in a playoff spot for another night.

Yes, good times!

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#468 Rocket
April 04 2013, 12:12AM
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Finally just watched the highlights for the first time because I missed the game stuck at work.

Survey says: Great game!

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#469 G Money
April 04 2013, 12:14AM
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G Money wrote:

I am a little worried about tonights game (which I will be at) ... teams with nothing left to play for can be uninterested and terrible, or they can be so relaxed that they play superbly well.

And the Flames still have Tanguay, Cammalleri, Glencross, Cervenka, and Hudler ...

Speaking of which, that Cervenka kid looked pretty good last game. No way someone talented belongs on the Flames. Perhaps Fester will trade him to us for, say, Tulupov and Martindale? Honestly, those guys are prospects, so they *must* be good!

OK, fine, 8-1 Oilers.

Damn, off by one error.

I assumed the Oilers would spot the Flames just one goal to make it a bit more interesting.

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#470 FireOnIce
April 04 2013, 12:18AM
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Rocket wrote:

Win streak & down every team in front of The Oilers? Wow, thanks Flames that would really help The Oilers out.

Also, Jankoski might turn out good but best in his draft? I want what you're smoking 'cause it seems strong!

In the 90s, the Flames would get knocked out of contention, and then beat every team that was actually good and going to the playoffs. Something about how "the pressure was off" so they were just playing hockey and having fun.

And the Jankowski comment was laden with sarcasm...

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#471 DigDeepNBleedBlue
April 04 2013, 12:20AM
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Rocket wrote:

Vancouver is going to be really tough to beat at home. They're still a contender & they have that jerk Bieksa running around apparently doing whatever he wants against the kids.

Still, would be nice for The Oilers to keep rolling. Go for blood totally!

Loungo's press conference has me thinking the team is a mess right now.

Game plan: Shoot! lol

This sh*t is wicked! Keep fighting, boys!

Gotta give some props to Whitney. Good game.

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#472 Buttonpusher
April 04 2013, 12:20AM
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@drdoogie16

Ok drdoogie (did your mom let you pick your own name?) maybe its time to lay off the sauce! Nice crack about Gregor's hair...I bet all your pals at school tomorrow will laugh when you tell them about it at recess! Haha "this sight" and "Parody rules" had me laughing out loud! If you weren't a Flamers fan I'd think you were trying to make a couple puns there...but we all know it's just that you're not all that bright! Enjoy the long road ahead...at least you've got Jay "the genius" Feaster to...oh never mind...

GO OILERS!!

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#473 Rocket
April 04 2013, 12:24AM
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FireOnIce wrote:

In the 90s, the Flames would get knocked out of contention, and then beat every team that was actually good and going to the playoffs. Something about how "the pressure was off" so they were just playing hockey and having fun.

And the Jankowski comment was laden with sarcasm...

Yeah I totally missed the sarcasm sorry although I still think he's a pretty good prospect.

And good on you for the Flames history lesson in the 90's. It seems you're not a bandwagon fan which is good.

Also, The Oilers were very terrible as well in the 90's.

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#474 Franko J
April 04 2013, 12:28AM
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Can you say Mackinnon. Or maybe Jones.

It is the Flames turn now to suck. All I can say is anticipation.

Can't wait for April 29th. Kudos to the Oilers with the win. Irony is that dominant players on the Oilers have ties to Calgary.

However, when you play with little or no heart an embarrassing loss like tonight will happen. This team has many, many problems that not even 3 first round picks can fix. After the shellacking from Boston last season that was a sign that this team was on the down slide. After tonight, this loss was a clear indication that this team has no pride and the house cleaning should continue in the off season.

I just thought this loss was going to happen on Monday night.

I don't think this team will win no more than 3 games for the rest of this season.

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#475 Sincity1976
April 04 2013, 12:30AM
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Bouwmeester traded: ~200 comments Iginla traded: ~350 comments

Flames get obliterated by the Oiler's: 450 comments and counting.

Wow.

PS. That was horrible.

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#476 Buttonpusher
April 04 2013, 12:35AM
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@Franko J

Would that be similar to the irony of the greatest player in your pathetic franchise's history being from Edmonton?

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#477 oldhippy
April 04 2013, 12:36AM
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Rocket wrote:

Trying to come up with an argument why The Panthers are still better than The OIlers.

Now that Smithson is an Oiler, DSF's head just exploded.

Thing is, although he has always purported to be a disenchanted Oiler fan, he is actually a Flamer. No Oiler fan, no matter how disgusted with Oiler management, would ever defend the return on the Iginla trade. He has been off his game (and rocker) ever since that one sided movement.

In the future, DON'T FEED THE TROLL!

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#478 Craig MacTambeloweni
April 04 2013, 12:42AM
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Yak city dominating that squad of cowgirls is always good, and spanking the canucks (again) shouldn't be a problem just because hallsy has been in beast mode lately. Two or three more games like that and he will lead the nhl in points. Also I heard flames central in calgary is a gay bar

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#479 lionlager
April 04 2013, 12:51AM
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Keep planning that parade.

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#480 Franko J
April 04 2013, 12:56AM
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Sorry one more thing.

The Flames fans are the one who were truly beaten down. They should be asking for a refund. The players on the Flames who played on the ice tonight showed no professionalism. The Oilers deserved the win hands down. I understand that this team is going through a tough time, but what I cannot tolerate as a fan is watching a team that doesn't exemplify pride. Most importantly after going up 2-0, there is no excuse when this team again is so easily satisfied with marginal effort.

This team may lack talent, but I hate watching players who give up. I work hard to make a living and when I see what I saw on the ice tonight was total unacceptable. At this point in time why would I want to support a team where they could care less about the fan.

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#481 Rocket
April 04 2013, 01:04AM
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Franko J wrote:

Sorry one more thing.

The Flames fans are the one who were truly beaten down. They should be asking for a refund. The players on the Flames who played on the ice tonight showed no professionalism. The Oilers deserved the win hands down. I understand that this team is going through a tough time, but what I cannot tolerate as a fan is watching a team that doesn't exemplify pride. Most importantly after going up 2-0, there is no excuse when this team again is so easily satisfied with marginal effort.

This team may lack talent, but I hate watching players who give up. I work hard to make a living and when I see what I saw on the ice tonight was total unacceptable. At this point in time why would I want to support a team where they could care less about the fan.

You really nailed it there.

Not protecting a lead, underachieving, fan apathy.

All things Oilers fans have had to deal with for a while. Welcome to mediocrity, it sucks.

It will hurt for a while but don't give up those season tickets yet.

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#482 oldhippy
April 04 2013, 01:05AM
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Rocket wrote:

Well said. Good advice. I will try.

I know how hard it is. It's like having a canker sore, you want to leave it alone, but you just can't.

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#483 Franko J
April 04 2013, 01:06AM
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@ Buttonpusher

It takes a couple kids from Calgary to turn your lacklustre and simply droll team from their last 6 seasons of pathetic performance.

You know I like watching the Oilers play and I really like watching Eberle and Hall play, but I never in the past few seasons I have ever said anything negative towards the Oilers, so if you want to rip our franchise look into the mirror first.

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#484 Marcus
April 04 2013, 01:07AM
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Matt Henderson wrote:

The 2013 Flames are the 2007 Oilers.

They dont even know how bad it will get. Heck, Murray Edwards said he expects the Flames to be in the Playoffs next year.

Feaster is like Kevin Lowe... He tried a "Re-Tool" drafted Gagne, Cogliano, Pouliott, & Schremp and thought they were gonna rebound... 4,5,&6 yrs later they had 3 first overall picks. Out of sheer mismanagement that 3 year gap in there cost them all cred & ruined arguably all of the above mentioned players and others. Only by sheer luck did they fall on their face to land their recent 1st overalls. Luck won't strike twice in the same province.

If Feaster actually said they are better positioned than Edmonton now, he's seriously wrong in the head. He's on glue if he doesn't see his plan is flawed. He's absolutely towing the company line or one of the biggest numbskulls in the business.

If they ruin Sven & Johnny Hockey its gonna get ugly.

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#485 Rocket
April 04 2013, 01:10AM
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oldhippy wrote:

I know how hard it is. It's like having a canker sore, you want to leave it alone, but you just can't.

So you burn it out so it go's down in flames!

Zing! Or whatever. Go Oliers!

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#486 oldhippy
April 04 2013, 01:16AM
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@The Soup Fascist

Yeah man! Go Oilers.

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#487 geoilersgist
April 04 2013, 01:26AM
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Is this a new record for comments?

What a game though my gawd.

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#488 geeker99
April 04 2013, 03:29AM
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was at the game tonight. oil fan living in calgary so i have taken my share of abuse. all i have to say is 3 1st rounders coming. if you have the leadership it will turn around quickly. the kids on the oil have been the best players way too long and are becoming men. your fans i was sitting by tonight were world class and know it's tough sledding. I want 80's battles for me and my boy to enjoy. i have to admit i enjoyed tonight and don't lose interest in your club. head up

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#489 The Soup Fascist
April 04 2013, 06:49AM
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Franko J wrote:

@ The Soup Facist

Now it is your turn to have the same success with Eberle and Hall. Oh by the way, it wasn't 10 years, more like 16 years. The point I was implying is that the hockey Gods sure have an interesting way of balancing things out. There is no denying that the Flames enjoyed many great games and memories from Iginla, but I always found he played some of his best games against the Oilers. I see the same thing from both Eberle and Hall when it comes to playing against the Flames.

I hope for your sake that both Eberle and Hall can lead your team to the cup. Because the guy from St. Albert couldn't do that for the Flames.

Yeah that Iginla guy should have tried a little harder. But we gave you guys J Bo too and he is a proven playoff perf ....... whoops, scratch that.

Not to look a "gift horse in the mouth" or anything and I get where Hall was born and where Ebs' parents live, but honestly they count themselves as a proud Kingstoner and Reginaite .... um ..... Reginaer ........ no that cant be right ...... Reginonian........ er .... person from the city that rhymes with "fun", respectively.

But um, thanks for those two guys, ...... I suppose.

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#490 MICHAEL
April 04 2013, 08:19AM
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You know whats even better thna going to bed knowing we beat Calgary 8-2? Getting up and knowing that we beat Calgary 8-2. Its like Christmas. You just can't get enough of that feeling of joy. And tonight we get to fly into Vancouver and hand the Nucks a little of their medicine back to the Sedin Sisters. Edmonton 5 Nucks 1.

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#491 madjam
April 04 2013, 11:48AM
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Sad to see Flames aftermath after trade deadline ? Time for their humble pie . So much for an exciting Battle of Alberta .

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#492 Kent Wilson
April 04 2013, 11:52AM
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@stretch14

I was being sarcastic.

I figured the "Yay!" made it obvious enough, but I guess nothing is obvious to self-righteous EDM fans.

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#493 Pucker
April 04 2013, 02:05PM
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Gordie Howe hat trick for Whitney. A couple Yak goals like we are expecting. Good game by the Oilers.

It was against Calgary, so as good as it feels kicking their butts - and now that that's over, the next big test is against the Canucks. I expect it might be a tougher contest. They're more of a NHL Caliber team.

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#494 geoilersgist
April 04 2013, 02:19PM
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Anyone that says they still think Whitney should have been traded needs a good swift kick in the arse. What a game that was. Keep the train a rolling boys

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#495 vetinari
April 04 2013, 03:22PM
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I hope the kids are as jazzed up as what the fans are and carry some of that momentum over to the Canucks.

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#496 The Soup Fascist
April 04 2013, 04:52PM
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Gregor, Why is Jarome wearing Yankee pinstriped baseball pants in the photo accompanying this article? I can't put my finger on it but I am not sure everything is kosher with this picture.

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#497 The Soup Fascist
April 04 2013, 04:54PM
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The Soup Fascist wrote:

Gregor, Why is Jarome wearing Yankee pinstriped baseball pants in the photo accompanying this article? I can't put my finger on it but I am not sure everything is kosher with this picture.

I don't really want a response to the question above, I am just doing my bit to try to hit 500 messages responding to your GDB. I know how douchey it is to reply to my own message but I figured it was for a good cause.

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#498 Gitagrip
April 04 2013, 06:05PM
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@The Soup Fascist

TFS your logic is sound and shared by a Kool-Aide drinking, unabashed homer like myself. I was at the Daytona 500 this year and it was pretty cool. 500 here would be sick as well. Who's with us???

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#499 Captain Ron
April 04 2013, 07:13PM
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Lets see how well the Oilers do tonight against a real team with with an NHL defence and better than below replacement level goaltending.

Now just two more to go for the big 5 0 0

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#500 Oilcruzer
April 04 2013, 07:28PM
Trash it!
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Seriously, we can't leave this thread at less than 500 posts.

Memo to Calgary. We empathize with your pain. If it smooths the hurt at all, Oil fans have fun with Flames fan with the rivalry. Vancouver bandwagon riders er fans are just annoying.

Ask the majority of "fans" in Vancouver to name three players who aren't a goalie or Swedish and you get a blank stare more often than not.

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