Note to self: Never believe in anything or anyone ever again.

That was it?

After those two glorious, fierce, inspiring wins in Calgary, this was the best the Flames could do?

I mean, okay, losing in Chicago is one thing (and who didn’t expect it at least a little bit?) but the WAY they lost. Oh my. That was perhaps the most embarrassing performance since the Atlanta game, and that was a pretty goddamn embarrassing performance. They were playing for the chance to close out the series at the Saddledome in front of the C of Red and they just said, “Nah, we’d prefer to have to come back here in the event that we do win in Calgary.”

WHAT KIND OF STRATEGY IS THIS?

The second the puck dropped in the first period, there was just zero will to do anything but skate around aimlessly and not shoot or pressure or do anything aside from the obvious, bewildering game plan:

1) Get the puck at the perimeter.

2) Drive to the high traffic areas regardless of how many Blackhawks you have to go through.

3) Turn the puck over.

If that was the way Mike Keenan drew it up (and the game gave me no reason to suspect otherwise), then bravo. Flawlessly executed. Couldn’t have gone better. Of course, if that was the way Keenan drew it up, he should have been fired in the first intermission.

The Home Flames are playing like a bunch of guys that want to win a series. The Road Flames are playing like a bunch of guys that made plans for a vacation next week and would be terribly aggrieved to have to reschedule or worse, cancel them.

Game 6 will almost certainly be the end of this team.

Hahaha okay.

Moving right along.

Here we are.

Miikka Kiprusoff — Terrible.

Mike Keenan — Awful.

Jarome Iginla — Atrocious.

The defense — Unwatchable.

Intensity — Nonexistant.

Urgency — None to be found.

Leadership — Left it in Calgary.

Hope they’ll make it out of Game 6 — Gone.